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06-Jul-2019 12:43
Japan punts itself as being a very “homogenous” country.
The vast majority (upwards of 90%, I’d say) hardly have the opportunity to interact with non-Japanese unless they travel overseas.
Of course you often won’t know the answer, but always be prepared for the “dotakyan” or last minute cancellation, especially on first dates. Grace Says: If you’re a woman, you might have to suggest the first date.
Martin says: There’s a trick question I often tell my (dating) clients: Q: When do you know if a Japanese girl will go on a date with you? Men assume foreign women are more outgoing and direct (which sucks when you aren’t).
As a guy looking to meet Japanese girls who are looking to meet foreign guys though, your best bets are what are called “International Parties” and “Language Exchanges”.“International Parties” are parties organized specifically to bring foreigners and Japanese folk together and give everyone the opportunity to meet and interact in a safer environment than clubs or bars provide, and are much more relaxed events that are usually held on Friday or Saturday evenings, with some events earlier in the afternoon.
Many of the organizers also run other kinds of seasonal events as well.
You can usually find the events by doing a Google search for Tokyo international parties, with events like this popping up regularly, but it probably won’t be long before you get invited to one via Facebook.
A really common mistake that most guys make when they communicate cross culturally is they think their subtle, razor sharp wit and wordplay will impress.
In general I’m always reluctant to recommend online dating to guys (the statistical chances of success are usually terrible for the average man), however there’s a few Japan focused dating sites where the “interracial appeal” may balance the odds a little, and of course there’s Tinder app for some quick swipe action. “English Lessons.” Websites like Hello Sensei (etc) let you teach English by offering lessons under the table. About ⅔ of the men I “teach” English to don’t ask for a second lesson once they find out I’m married. As a result, a lot of times their communication can be unclear or vague.
Two other friends started dating guys they met at English lessons. And in fact, this vagueness, or “aimai” in Japanese, is a well-studied trait in Japanese communication which is designed to be somewhat ambiguous to preserve the “wa” or harmony.
The other really easy way to meet Japanese girls is through Language Exchanges.
These are one-on-one meets where you practice speaking Japanese with a native while they practice speaking English/French/German/Italian/Korean/etc with you.You can find a language exchange partner in the classified section of many of the local English language magazines and there are a few sites specifically for finding a language exchange partner, e.g. Also there are language exchange groups on meetup.com, which are usually like a cross between language exchange and international parties. Be careful, most the guys you meet here are married (or otherwise taken) and just looking for the “American” experience (if you know what I mean). Walk around Shibuya and make eye contact with men, trying to get . Fun Cheapo Fact: In Japan it’s not uncommon for singles to spend hundreds of thousands of yen on “konkatsu” (婚活) or marriage hunting services!